In the Meantime
by TrixieFirecracker
Summary: A bit of a retcon of season 2 that includes what happened when Mac used her cell phone interceptor to listen in on Cassidy's conversations.
1. Chapter 1

"So I'm doing chapters 12 and 13 and you're doing chapters 14 and 15?"

There was the sound of a sigh and a voice replied, "Yeah. This jigsaw activity is the worst. What was Wu thinking?"

Cassidy's laugh could be heard. "I dunno, man. Listen, I got a lot of reading to do tonight, so I'll talk to you later."

"Alright. Later."

The conversation ended. Mac sighed and rubbed at her eyes. This was crazy, there was no way she could justify her behavior right now. She never should have borrowed that cell phone interceptor from her friend at Radio Shack. Of course, if she was going to start with "I should have nevers," she never should have brought up the whole physical thing with Cassidy. She never should have gotten into a relationship with him. And she never should have decided the younger Casablancas couldn't possibly break her heart. Shit, it was eight o'clock. She needed to get home and finish her term paper for history class. Mac sighed again and gazed at the Casablancas' home. She wondered what room was Cassidy's. He'd never let her into his inner sanctum and it had bothered her that he was unable to let her in to his life completely. It still bothered her.

"I guess that's not an issue now," Mac said to herself as she started her car. She couldn't believe she'd spent the last four hours sitting outside Cassidy's house, using her cell phone interceptor and listening to the various conversations that came out of the house. Driving home, Mac marveled at what she had listened to for the past few hours. She'd heard Kendall make a spa appointment and arrange to sell something else Richard "Big Dick" Casablancas had left in his hurry to get out of the country. Dick had conducted a booty call to someone named Bettina and then tried to initiate phone sex with Madison Sinclair. The phone sex thing had really squicked her out because she always thought about how she could be Madison and Madison could be Cindy. The idea of letting Dick put his hands anywhere on her body made her physically sick. She was glad when Madison shut that conversation down and had told him she'd call him tomorrow night.

As always, Mac's thoughts turned to Cassidy. Mac was convinced that there was someone else in Cassidy's life. There had to be someone else, right? He was your average red blooded teenage boy, there was no way he'd be turning down a physical relationship unless he was getting satisfaction somewhere else. Mac turned her car down the familiar streets that led to her home and went through her mental checklist of any other girls who had even shown a passing interest in Cassidy. So far she had one candidate: a freshman girl in gym who had asked Mac if she and Cassidy were dating. Mac had told her they were and the girl had said, "He's hot" and had tried to initiate a high five. Apparently, Cassidy was a heartthrob among the younger women in the school. Mac had given her a strange look and headed to gym class with Veronica.

Mac parked her car and walked into her home. Passing through her living room, Mac saw that her parents had fallen asleep on the couch and probably hadn't heard her come in. Good. That meant they would have no idea how late she came home. Mac headed to her bedroom, tossed her book bag onto her bed, and logged into Neptune High's email system. The freshman girl's email account was entirely too tempting to not hack and so she'd run an algorithm while she was at school and hoped to come home and see what that tramp was emailing Cassidy. She'd been unable to hack into Cassidy's account. Really, she'd guessed a few passwords and stopped. It seemed wrong. She was already listening to his phone calls, but she had to draw the line somewhere.

Success! The password sat at the end of several rows of code and with shaking fingers, Mac logged into the girl's account. After looking through the girl's inbox, sent email, and her trash, Mac found nothing that went to Cassidy's account or from his account. She was back at square one. Mac looked over at the cell phone interceptor she brought in from her car and knew she'd be back outside the Casablancas' again tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been an especially dull evening with few calls being made. Dick had made a phone call to Madison and was out for the evening. Kendall didn't seem to have arrived home yet. It seemed Cassidy was alone in the house. Mac had spent quite a few minutes glaring at the only light that she could see coming from the Casablancas house. Truth be told, she was still angry at Cassidy. She'd talked Veronica's ear off about how out of left field the breakup had come from. Veronica had told her she needed to stop obsessing about it and Mac knew she was right, but the breakup was only a week old. She figured she had a few more days of stalking left and then she'd be ready to move on.

Mac had set up the cell phone interceptor to work with the speakers of her car and was jolted awake when Cassidy received a call. Mac realized he was mid conversation with someone else.

"A couple of Sharks had to know about it. They'll come forward. Things like this don't stay secret."

"Yeah, but, I mean, do you guys really want people to know about it?" Beaver was speaking in a pleading tone. Mac had never heard him sound so pathetic.

"He's sick and what he did to us was wrong." The other voice sounded so familiar to Mac.

"Look, please don't drag me into this," Cassidy continued to speak in a panicked voice.

"You're already in it. You'll thank us later." The line went dead and Mac looked up at the light glowing from what she surmised was Beaver's room. From this far away, she couldn't hear anything, but she knew Cassidy had to be upset. What were they talking about? Sharks? What had happened that Cassidy didn't want anyone knowing about? Mac knew she shouldn't, but she got out of her car and decided she'd knock on his door. She had to know if he was okay. There was a hoodie of his that was still in her car that she could say she needed to give him. Mac had started walking closer to the house when she heard the front door of the Casablancas house slam. Feeling frightened and rethinking her plan, Mac hightailed it back to her car. Mac got back to her car as Cassidy's raced past her and Mac thought she was in the clear. She tossed the hoodie into the back seat of her car and was prepared to get back into the car when Cassidy backed his car up to where she was parked.

"What are you doing here?" Cassidy asked angrily.

Stalking you. Trying to figure out what went wrong. Mac's mind was a blank. She opened her mouth to say something and nothing could come to mind. "I am, uh, tutoring Madison Sinclair's little sister." She licked her lips and spoke again. "They want her prepared for standardized tests. I made a simulation for their computer to use."

Cassidy looked at her and nodded. "Oh."

He started to shift his car into gear again when Mac decided she might as well give him back the hoodie he'd left in her car. "Wait! You left a sweatshirt in my car. I was planning to give it to Dick, but I might as well give it to you now." Mac reached into her back seat and pulled the hoodie out. She hated giving the sweatshirt back. It was like really admitting that they were over. It had been comforting to have the sweatshirt in her back seat for those few days. She'd come back to her car and it would smell faintly of Cassidy's cologne, having been warmed up from sitting in her car all day.

Cassidy took the sweatshirt and tossed it onto the passenger seat next to him. "Thanks," was all he could muster up to say to her. Mac noticed that he couldn't even look her in the eye.

"You seem upset. Are you okay?" Mac leaned closer to Cassidy's car and put her hand out to touch his arm that had been hanging out of the car window. Cassidy flinched and pulled his arm back into the car.

Cassidy nodded and stared straight ahead. "Thanks, I'm fine."

"Okay, but if you need anyth-" the rest of Mac's sentence was cut off by Cassidy.

"I'm fine. Don't worry about me." Cassidy put his car in gear and sped off.

Mac sighed and sank onto the curb next to her. What was wrong with him? What was wrong with her? Cassidy had indicated he wasn't interested in her anymore. Why did she keep trying? Tears welled up on her eyes and she sat on the curb for a few minutes, giving into the tears. Across the street she heard a door close and footsteps approached her. She looked up with tear filled eyes to see who it was.

"Hello, Mrs. Sinclair," Mac mumbled.


	3. Chapter 3

Mrs. Sinclair sat on the curb next to Mac. "Are you okay?"

Mac swiped at her eyes with the corner of her jacket and asked, "How did you know I was out here?"

Mrs. Sinclair sighed and waited a few moments to speak. "I know we agreed we wouldn't tell you girls what happened, at least until you were eighteen, but once I saw you and Lauren together in the library last year, I haven't been able to stop wondering about you." She hesitantly patted Mac's knee. "When you came to our house that day, I knew you had found out the truth. I just wasn't ready to come face to face with the daughter I had lost."

"And now?" Mac looked at her birth mother's face. "What's changed?"

Mrs. Sinclair stood up and motioned for Mac to follow her. "Come inside the house. Madison and her father aren't home. It'll be just you and me."

Mac stood and started following Mrs. Sinclair into the house. "What about Lauren?"

"She's asleep," Mrs. Sinclair said as she opened the door to her home. Mac followed her. Mrs. Sinclair led her through a series of hallways until they came to the kitchen. Once there, she sat down at a small table and Mac sat down on a chair across from her. "I've seen you sitting outside our house for the second night in a row. I thought it was time we talked."

In her mania to figure the enigma that was Cassidy, Mac had missed the fact that she'd spent the past two days sitting outside her birth parents home for hours at a time. "To be honest, I wasn't spying on you. I was spying on someone else."

"Who?" Mrs. Sinclair asked.

"Cassidy Casablancas. We just broke up," Mac said and shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "I don't want you to think I'm some creepy girl who can't get over things. It's just that I . . ." Mac hesitated about whether or not to tell Mrs. Sinclair the truth. Perhaps it would be easier to confess to a complete stranger. "Why we broke up was just so weird."

"How so?"

Mac looked into eyes that were similar to her own. "We'd been dating for four months. The closest he's ever come to touching me was when he brushed some dog hair off my butt, so I brought it up to him and he freaked out. Broke up with me on the spot. I just can't figure out what I did wrong."

"Well, he's younger than you, isn't he? Maybe he's not ready." Mrs. Sinclair thought for a moment. "From what I've seen and heard Dick say, the family isn't very nice to Beaver. He's always kind of been this shy, sort of twitchy boy. He doesn't really fit in with the rest of them."

Mac nodded. "I know. I just don't understand him. Like, at all. Then I heard something weird tonight. He was talking on the phone to someone, I don't know who, and they talked about someone who was sick and what he did to Cassidy was wrong." Mac chewed on her lip a moment before speaking again. Does that mean what I think it means?"

Mrs. Sinclair looked taken aback. "It sounds like it. No one knows?"

Mac shook her head. "No. He was begging the guy he was talking on the phone with to keep him out of it. What do I do?"

"You have to go to the police about what you heard. They'll talk to Beaver, they can figure it out." Mrs. Sinclair reached out to hold Mac's hand, but Mac pulled away.

"I can't. I was using a cell phone interceptor when I heard that conversation, what I was doing was illegal. And Cassidy would kill me if I went to the police." Mac shook her head. "He sounded so desperate on the phone, I can't do that to him. Not yet." Mac checked her cell phone and got up. "Listen, I have to go. My parents are probably wondering where I am."

Mrs. Sinclair nodded and led Mac back to the front door. She brushed Mac's hair back from her forehead and gave her an awkward hug goodbye. In a daze, Mac walked back to her car and found Cassidy sitting on the curb next to her car. She sat down beside him and Cassidy wrapped his arms around her. He began sobbing. "I'm so alone."


	4. Chapter 4

Cassidy stood up and pulled Mac up with him. Taking her by the hand, he started pulling her towards his house. "Where are we going?" Mac asked as she struggled to keep up with his pace. Cassidy didn't answer. Dropping her hand briefly, Mac watched as he punched a sequence of numbers into his home alarm and tugged her inside.

Cassidy led them up a staircase and down a dark hallway. He opened the door and began shedding his clothing. "What are you doing?" Mac asked him in a horrified voice and put her hands over her eyes.

"I need some sleep. Just stay with me, I can't stand being alone right now. You can sleep over there if you want," Cassidy gestured to an uncomfortable looking cot across the room. Clothing was piled on top of it.

Annoyed, Mac asked, "Why don't you sleep there and I get your bed?"

Cassidy pulled the covers over his head. "It's my bed. I get to sleep in it."

Mac stood up and walked to his bedroom door. Placing her hand on the doorknob, Mac looked back at Cassidy. "There's no way I'm sleeping on that lumpy cot when you're sleeping in the lap of luxury over there." Cassidy stared at her with sad eyes from his bed. "You want the company, I don't."

Cassidy quirked an eyebrow at her and scooted over in his bed. "Fine."

Mac walked over to the bed and sat on the edge. "You don't have to act like you're doing me a favor, you know," she said as she pulled off her shoes.

Cassidy rolled over so his back was to her. "Isn't this what you wanted? To get me in bed?"

That was it. Mac had had enough. She gave an aggravated groan and began putting her shoes on again. "Goodnight, Cassidy. I hope you'll be able to sleep. By yourself."

Cassidy immediately rolled over in bed and put his hand on his arm. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. Please stay."

Mac looked at Cassidy. "Don't do that again. I'm here because we used to be friends. I'm not climbing into your bed in some pathetic attempt to seduce you. I know you're not into me like that." Mac took her shoes off for the second time and stretched out on top of the covers as far away from Cassidy as possible.

Cassidy turned to look at her. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Yikes, she'd put her foot in her mouth. She meant that he wasn't into her anymore because he'd broken up with her. He'd refused to take their relationship past second base. Mac realized he thought she was making a crack about his sexuality. "You broke up with me, Cassidy. I took that to mean you weren't into me anymore."

"Oh."

Mac reach across Cassidy and turned the bedroom light off. "Goodnight, Cassidy." The whole room smelled like him and it was driving her crazy to be lying in bed next to the boy she loved and not be able to touch him. Mac settled herself into a position she thought she could fall asleep in. She had just started to count sheep when Cassidy nudged her awake.

"I never said I wasn't into you. There's just so much going on in my life. I think it was just the wrong time to start a relationship. I lied when I said you were doing something wrong. It's me. There's something wrong with me."

Mac turned her head to try and look at Cassidy in the darkness. "I'm not going to push you to tell me about it, but if you ever want to talk, I'm here."

Cassidy reached over and squeezed her hand. "I know." He pulled Mac closer so that she was resting her head on his chest. They both fell asleep in minutes.

A few hours later, Mac's cell phone went off, alerting her that it was time to wake up. She took brief shower in the bathroom that was attached to Cassidy's bedroom and snuck out of his room. Walking as quietly as possible, Mac didn't expect to run into Dick.

"What are you doing here, Ghost World? Didn't Beaver kick your ass to the curb a couple of weeks ago?" Dick took in her disheveled appearance and the fact that she was sneaking out of Cassidy's room at 6 in the morning and came to a conclusion. "Oh shit, did you and Beaver do the dirty deed?"

Mac thought about how much shit Dick gave Cassidy for how sexually inexperienced he was. Cassidy was going through something she couldn't understand and Dick's constant teasing only made things worse for him. She was going to take a hit for Cassidy and it was going to suck. "Yeah, we did, Dick."

The shocked look on Dick's face almost made it worth it.


	5. Chapter 5

Author's note: I'm trying to weave in some of season 2 events, so dialogue is taken from the episode "Nevermind the Buttocks."

Mac had told her parents that she'd stayed late at Veronica's working on their history term paper and barely managed to avoid being grounded until she left for college in the fall. Pulling into a parking space at Neptune High, Mac had looked at the cell phone interceptor on the passenger seat. She wouldn't felt safe with it in her car all day and decided to put it in her school locker. She'd just check on it every period and hope no one took it.

Now Mac knew what a dumb idea that was. Clemmons probably didn't even know what he'd confiscated and yet he took it anyway. And she wasn't going to be able to get it back until the end of the year? That was not going to cut it with her buddy from Radio Shack and she definitely didn't have the cash to pay for it outright. Feeling hopeless, Mac rested her head against her locked and then lightly started banging it into the locker. Maybe if she hit it long enough, she'd bang some sense into her head and stop messing around with this Cassidy situation. Footsteps approached and Mac looked up to see Veronica.

"Mac Attack, what's the haps?" Veronica quipped.

"I got mugged. By my own principal. They took my cell phone interceptor and plan on keeping it until the end of the year. What happened to until the end of the day? Why wasn't that working?"

Veronica shrugged. "Everyone still kept bringing their cell phone interceptors?"

"Is there any chance you can get it back for me? I borrowed it from my buddy at Radio Shack, because apparently I've become a psycho ex-girlfriend and I wanted to listen to Beaver's cell phone calls." Just saying it out loud to someone else made her realize how insane that idea had been. And now she was dearly paying for that fit of insanity.

Veronica gave Mac a long look. "You're judging me." Thank god she hadn't told Veronica how and where she'd spent last night.

"No. I'm judging myself. Why don't I have a cellphone interceptor?"

"Please, respect the business model, Veronica. I do the gadgets. You do the actual espionage."

"I'll see what I can do."

Both girls nodded at each other and headed off in opposite directions.

Later that afternoon, she watched as Veronica knocked slowly on Clemmons' door three times. Butters pulled it open. "That was your knock?"

"The genius is its simplicity," Veronica replied.

Mac watched as Veronica sifted through the box of the confiscated locker booty. She decided she should probably say something to thank Butters for helping her out. "Wow, Butters, this is-this is way cool of you."

"Just so you know, I'm a great dancer." Mac gave him a confused look. "So don't worry about that."

"Oh. O-kay. I'll try not to," Mac said. What was going on with this guy? He was even stranger than usual today.

They watched Veronica dig through the box a bit more. Mac noticed Veronica kept interrupting Butter's odd conversation with her by showing them some of the strange things that were confiscated.

"So, Mac, what color dress are you wearing?"

Dress? Was Butters high? "I'm actually wearing pants."

Butter laughed. "Right. I just don't want the corsage to be, like, blue and the dress is red and you think I'm an idiot."

Was he talking about Prom? Panic set in. "Veronica?" Mac asked as calmly as possible. Was this how Veronica had gotten Butters to agree to help get her cell phone interceptor back?

Veronica held up the cell phone interceptor. "Oh, your cell phone interceptor!"

Mac gave Veronica a dour look. She was going to kill Veronica. She and Cassidy had talked about going, but now that they were broken up, Mac had no intention of going to prom. And now she was going to go with Butters? Mac looked around as she watched Veronica gather up some book for Weevil and rush them out of the room. Could they tell she was screaming inside?

"I'm thinking white limo if that's cool," Butters said as Veronica pulled Mac out the door. Mac said nothing.

It might have been better to be on the hook for that interceptor after all.


	6. Chapter 6

Cassidy watched Mac shelving books from the far side of the library. He'd heard that Clemmons had confiscated something from her locker and she'd had the temerity to take it back. Clemmons couldn't prove she'd been the one to take it or how it had happened, but Mac had been punished nonetheless. One of Clemmons favorite things to make students do was shit jobs no one else wanted to do, like filing endlessly or shelving books in the school library. Cassidy had ended up in the library in an effort to avoid Peter and Marcos who continued to harass him about making a statement to the police to corroborate what they had already told Lamb. Cassidy had decided to pass on that invitation.

He watched as Mac pushed the shelving cart aside and reached into her backpack. She placed a set of earbuds in her ears and pulled out a biography of Ada Lovelace and began to read. Apparently, she had no intention of shelving books and was going to hide out in the library stacks until her time was up. Cassidy grabbed his backpack and headed over.

"So . . . Butters, huh?" Cassidy asked, pulling an apple out of his backpack and taking a bite.

Mac looked up, startled. "Huh?"

"I heard you were going to prom with Butters," Cassidy said as he sat down next to Mac in the stacks.

He heard Mac give a long sigh. "Yes, I am."

"Really, Butters?" Cassidy gave a little chuckle and shook his head.

"So?" Mac gave Cassidy a sidelong glance. She had thought about saying Butters was a nice guy, but thought better of it. Blackmailing someone into going to prom with you, even after the principal figured out that you had raided his office, was a crappy thing to do.

"So I thought you could do better than that," Cassidy finished his apple and tossed it on the book shelving cart. The symbolism of Cassidy and the apple, coming to tempt her was not lost on Mac.

Mac flipped through the biography, trying to feign nonchalance. "Better than what?"

"The guy was pantsed in public," Cassidy shrugged. "He's just kinda a goofball, you know?"

"Yeah, I mean, it's not as cool as hanging out with freshmen and making war movies," Mac said acidly as she pulled out her cell phone to check the time. Thank god, her time in the library was almost up.

Cassidy decided to ignore Mac's dig. "He didn't take back his invitation once he heard you and I had sex? Or hasn't he heard?"

Mac wanted to start laughing. Did he actually think threatening to tell Butters about the sex they didn't have was going to frighten her? He'd be doing her a favor if he could get her out of that date. "Oh please, I know for a fact Dick has been telling the entire school how you 'bagged' me, and Butters doesn't seem to care."

Jealousy surged though Cassidy. "You can't really like him."

Mac shrugged. It was a little fun messing with Cassidy, finally giving him some payback for misery she had endured for the past couple of weeks. "Well, he's got a leg up on the competition."

"Oh, and what's that?"

Mac quirked an eyebrow at Cassidy like he'd done to her so many times before. "He's asked if he should book a hotel room for that night."

Cassidy got up and brushed off his pants. "Like I said before: good luck getting laid." He started to head out of the library when Mac put her hand on his arm.

"Can't we be friends?" Cassidy looked at her and shook his head. "Well, I don't want to be enemies."

Cassidy smiled a little at Mac's joke. "I can't just be friends with you, but right now, we can't be more."

"Don't," she said. "Don't do this to me."

Cassidy shook off her hand, but stayed in his spot. "Do what?"

"You can't keep pulling me in and pushing me away. It's not fair to me."

Cassidy nodded. "I know." Cassidy's cell phone buzzed. He pulled it from his pocket and checked the screen. Peter had sent him another message.

"You know to figure out what you want, Cassidy."

"I don't know what I want," Cassidy whispered. He turned and walked out of the library and away from Mac.


	7. Chapter 7

Alterna-Prom had sucked so far for Mac. She'd been picked up in a Hummer limo and eaten dinner on a pirate ship. She didn't even want to discuss Butters' outfit. He looked like he'd been dressed by a crazy parrot. Mac had had three drinks from the open bar so far and it hadn't taken the edge off the evening for her. She watched as Dick roamed around the party offering the other girls sips from his "party pig." She wasn't surprised when he strode up to her.

"Wanna sip?" Dick offered. He was eyeing the sliding glass door in a way Mac didn't like. Then again there wasn't much that Mac liked about what Dick did.

Mac thought about it for a moment. So far she'd only seen Dick taking sips from it and he didn't seem to have any open sores near his mouth. Mac figured she'd take the chance and took a sip. "This party sucks," she commented after she'd finished swallowing.

Dick nodded. "Tell me about it. You're the first chick to say anything to me that didn't include 'Fuck off.'" Dick took the party pig's straw back and had a long gulp of the beer. "Anyway, you're Beaver's chick, so that doesn't even count."

Mac made a face. "I'm not Beaver's chick. You'll notice that I'm here with Butters." Mac took back the straw from Dick and took another long sip.

"Damn, Ghost World, you can really put that away! Do you have a hollow leg under that dress?" Dick made a grab for Mac's leg and she kicked him. "Ow! Save the rough stuff for Beaver."

"You're disgusting," Mac shook her head and started to walk away from Dick. Or she tried to walk away, but Dick followed her.

"Why are you here with him?" Dick asked.

Mac stopped short and Dick bumped into her. She turned around and rubbed her face in her hands. She absolutely could not handle this situation right now. "Dick, Cassidy and I broke up, okay? That's why I'm here with Butters. He asked and I decided to go."

Dick got a confused look on his face. "You mean to tell me that you and Beaver had nerd sex or played strip Dungeons and Dragons or whatever and Beaver broke up with you? Were you really that bad?"

"Are you kidding me?" Mac yelled at Dick. Why was she holding onto Cassidy's secret? He'd been a total ass to her and now his brother was playing sex detective with her. She had never wished to see Butters more than she did now, but he was busy dancing with some girl whose outfit was as loud as his.

Dick was taken aback by Mac's outrage. "Why are you so mad?"

"Dick, you can't ask people those kind of questions. It's rude. Anyway, why don't you ask Cassidy why we broke up? He's the one who did the breaking up."

"Really?"

"Really. Why are you so surprised?" Mac wondered why Dick had such a low opinion of Cassidy.

Dick shrugged and pulled the party pig off his shoulder. "I dunno. I just figured Cassidy would fall in love with the first girl he fucked." Mac grimaced at Dick's word choice, but Dick ignored it and looked into Mac's eyes. "I can see what he sees in you. You're nice and smart. Pretty too. You get him and no other girl has been able to do that."

Mac was shocked by Dick's kind words. "Why are you telling me this?"

"'Cause he won't tell you that." Dick picked the party pig back up and hoisted it onto his shoulder again. "Anyway, I'm drunk. Usually that's the only time I tell the truth." Dick reached his free arm out towards Mac and for a second she thought he was going to try and hug her, but he reached past her and flicked the light switch for Logan's balcony a few times.

"What are you doing?" Mac asked.

"I just wanted to see if it worked," Dick said and walked away.

Cassidy watched the light from Logan's balcony flicker and figured that was Dick had giving him the signal. His night was just beginning.


	8. Chapter 8

Cassidy pulled up the hood of his sweatshirt and approached the only Hummer that was in the Neptune Grand's parking lot. Butters had to be the only idiot who had wanted to take a Hummer to a party in someone's hotel room. "Hey, you wanna make some easy money?" He flashed the driver several hundred dollar bills.

The driver looked mildly interested and rolled down the window a few inches. "Yeah? How?"

"Go home. Ignore the guy who rented your car for tonight's calls. That's it."

"That's it?" The driver rolled down the window to the car all the way. "Is this a scam?"

Cassidy flashed the guy a grin. "Not at all. The girl who came with the guy who rented this car is someone I'm involved with . . ." Cassidy let his voice trail off. "You know how it is."

The driver reached through the window for the cash. "I got it. How much is that?"

Cassidy pulled the money back from his grasp. "A thousand dollars. When the guy calls wondering where you are, don't answer. And this conversation never happened."

The man nodded and started up the limousine. "What conversation? My mom had a bad fall and I went to the hospital." Cassidy nodded and handed the man the money. The limo made an awkward U-turn in the parking lot and pulled away. Cassidy pulled out his cell phone and sent Dick a text. '_The limo's taken care of. Tell me when you're ready to go._'Now all he had to do was wait for the party to die down. Cassidy walked back to his car and prepared to settle in for the night.

A few hours later, Cassidy was startled awake by the tone coming from his phone indicating he had a text message. He read the message and started the car. He pulled the car up to the entrance to the Neptune Grand and waited for Dick to appear. Minutes later Dick showed up swaying and leaning on Butters. Mac walked slowly behind them and looked annoyed. Cassidy got out of the car and walked over to where Butters, Mac, and Dick were standing. Butters was on his cell phone.

"C'mon, Dick. Let's go," Cassidy made a motion to pull Dick onto his shoulder to help him to his car. Dick leaned heavily on his shoulder and almost knocked Cassidy over. Cassidy looked over at Butters. "Hey man, a little help?" Butters ignored Cassidy and continued with his call. Cassidy looked at Mac. "Something wrong?"

Mac grimaced. "He's been trying to get ahold of our limo driver for an hour. He's not picking up. I think he's going to have to call his dad." Mac looked at the car Cassidy had pulled up in. "This isn't your car. Is this your dad's?"

Cassidy nodded. "One of them. Kendall's slowly trying to sell them off, so I might as well get some use out of them while I can. Too bad it's a two seater, otherwise I could give you and Butters a ride home."

Mac thought about the uncomfortable drive home she was going to have with Clemons driving her and Butters home. It was going to be awkward fending off Butters' advances with his dad keeping a watchful eye on them. She supposed she was going to have to let him kiss her goodnight. Maybe he'd be satisfied with a peck on the cheek. Mac walked over to where Butters had wandered off to and tried to see if she could hear anything about a ride home.

"Did you finally get ahold of the driver?"

"No," Butters sighed. "My dad said he'd drive us home. I suppose we can wait in the lobby until he comes." Butters nodded to Cassidy who was leaning against his car. "What'd he want?"

"He wanted some help wrangling Dick," Mac commented. The longing look she was giving Cassidy was not lost on Butters.

"Why don't you get him to give you a ride home? It's going to awhile before my dad arrives and I don't feel right making you stay here to wait." Butters knew he was fighting a losing fight. Mac wasn't going to be getting over Cassidy anytime soon.

Mac stood up and leaned over to give Butters a soft kiss on his cheek. "Thanks, Vincent." She walked back to where Cassidy stood. He was now making a call on his cell phone. "Where's Dick?'

Cassidy snapped his phone shut and turned around to look at her. "I dunno. He must have wandered off somewhere. I tried calling his phone, but he's not picking up. He's gotta be passed out somewhere." Cassidy opened his phone again. "I'm going to send him a text and call it a night. I've got better things to do than drive his drunk ass home."

Mac watched Cassidy type a short message to Dick and start to get into his car. "Cassidy? Would you mind giving me a ride home? Butters said it would be awhile and I just want to go home."

Cassidy nodded and opened the car door for Mac. "You hungry? There's a really cool all night diner that I discovered last month. You'd like it."

"Yeah, that sounds good." Mac felt her heart a familiar surge as Cassidy started the engine and pulled out of the Neptune Grand's parking lot.

Butters saw them leave just as Dick reappeared in the hotel lobby with a bucket full of ice and a bottle of champagne. "You looking for your brother? He just left with my date."

"Nah, I'm staying at Logan's tonight."

Butters noticed that the swaying that Dick had demonstrated last night was gone. In fact, he seemed completely sober. "Weren't you drunk a few minutes ago?

Dick smirked at Butters. "Nah, bromie. That was just an excuse for Cassidy to come here and take your date home." He punched the elevator button and stepped in. "Night." Once the doors closed, Dick checked his messages. There was a short one from Beaver. _"Thanks for your help tonight. Mission accomplished."_ Dick smiled. Staying sober tonight had been worth it.


	9. Chapter 9

To an outsider, you'd think they were a just a couple of teenagers celebrating their after prom. Or maybe a girl who had snuck out of prom to be with the guy she really wanted to go with. Mac sat in a diner booth in her pretty red prom dress with Cassidy's hoodie keeping her warm. Cassidy sat next to her in the booth with his arm around her. Mac laid her head on his shoulder and breathed in deeply. Cassidy's familiar smell filled her lungs and Mac wished it could always be this way for them. She liked feeling like they were normal teenagers, out on a date and nothing would be able to tear them apart. At the same time, she couldn't help wondering when things would fall apart again. She had a tendency to saw the wrong thing and Cassidy had a tendency to overreact when he felt threatened. Mac supposed it came from living with Dick and Big Dick. She figured Cassidy was used to constantly living on the offensive, afraid to reveal any weaknesses. It sucked that he couldn't trust her, no matter how much she tried to show that she wouldn't hurt him. Mac's musings were interrupted when Cassidy leaned over and took a sip of her fruit smoothie.

"Hey! That's mine!" Mac slapped Cassidy's hands away from her drink. "You have your hamburger over there."

Cassidy laughed and went back to his original position. "Maybe I want to be a vegan."

Mac gave him a sidelong glance. "My ass. The last time you took me to a vegan restaurant, we had to stop at In-N-Out on the way home because you said you were weak from lack of meat." She felt Cassidy tug her closer and she scooted nearer to him in the booth. This was the Cassidy she was used to. Here was the boy who would pull her close to hold her hand while walking in the school hallways or who liked to watch movies with her head laying on his shoulder. She realized that those were the small ways that he showed he trusted her. They were probably the only ways that he felt he could trust her. Would he ever change? Although she dreaded it, now was the time to try and have a talk with him. "Being with you makes me really happy, Cassidy."

Cassidy nodded. "I know."

Mac pulled away from him and turned to look into his eyes. "That's all you have to say? I tell you that spending time with you makes me happy and your response is 'I know'?"

"What am I supposed to say?" Cassidy looked confused. "I don't understand. We're having a good time. This is nice."

Mac had the suddenly feeling it was always going to be this way. She was always going to be chasing after him and wanting more than he was wanted to give. She pulled off his sweatshirt and handed it back to him. "I'm tired of this."

Cassidy watched as she pulled out her phone and started to make a call. "What are you doing?"

Mac shushed him. "I need a cab to come get me at the Studio Diner. As soon as possible, please." Mac give the dispatcher her number and ended the call. "They're going to be here in a few minutes, so we don't have much time to talk."

Cassidy shook his head. "Why are you making this a big deal?"

Mac sighed. "Because I tell you how I feel about you and you never share anything with me about how you feel. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and hoping the outcome will be different." Mac paused and took Cassidy's hand. "I keep doing this over and over with you and nothing changes."

Cassidy's eyes shifted. "I know I can't give you what you want," he began. "But I can't let you go."

That was going to be as close to a declaration of love from him as she was going to get from Cassidy, but Mac just couldn't be satisfied with it. "I know. I feel the same way about you, but we have to be honest with each other. Nothing's changed, not really. The problems we had before are still there."

"I just . . ." Cassidy sputtered.

Mac knew he wasn't ready to share his problems with her and there was no way she'd push him. "I know. You're not ready. And that's okay." Mac wrapped her arms around him and hugged him. Cassidy wrapped his arms around her tightly, but loosened his grip when he heard Mac's phone chime.

"Your ride's here," he said miserably.

Mac pulled Cassidy back into her embrace. "I have to study for my computer science final this weekend, but I'll see at you school on Monday. We'll figure something out." Mac kissed Cassidy softly and stood up. She started to walk away when she stopped and turned around. "You know, Dick's not such a bad guy. I think he cares about you more than you know."

Cassidy nodded and watched Mac walk away. He knew.


	10. Chapter 10

Mac sighed and pulled her earbuds out of her ears. There was some sort of school bell going off. She looked at the clock at the bottom of her computer screen and saw that lunch wasn't supposed to be over. Why was the school bell ringing? Mac looked over at the other students in the computer lab to see what they were doing. Other students were reluctantly shutting down their computers, logging out of World of Warcraft, and saving projects. Mr. Wu stood in the doorway.

"Everyone out. Go line up in the parking lot with your period 4 class," Mr. Wu was yelling as he began shooing students out of the computer lab.

Mac picked up her bag and stood next to Mr. Wu for a moment. "Mr. Wu, is this a fire drill?"

"As far as I know, this is not a drill," Mr. Wu said. His eyes were darting around the classroom and looking into the hallway.

"So it's not a drill. Someone must've pulled the alarm." Now Mac was annoyed. She made a mental note to check the school's camera footage when she got home. Mac wanted to know who had done it. She was working on finishing up a project for computer science and had been in the zone when the alarm had gone off. If it was Dick Casablancas who had pulled the alarm (and it usually was), she figured she'd blackmail him for the cash to buy a new graphics card for her desktop. He could afford it. "Do I really have to go out and line up in the parking lot? We'll just be sent back as soon as we reach the lot."

Mr. Wu stopped waving students out of the room and into the hallway and looked into Mac's eyes. "Shots were fired on lunch court. We need to get you guys to safety," he whispered to her.

Mac's heart seemed to stop. She thought of all her friends who regularly ate there. There was Veronica, Wallace, Logan, and . . . Cassidy. Mac hardly noticed that Mr. Wu had shoved her out the door and didn't know how she had made her way out of the deserted hallway into the bright sunlight. Mac pulled out her Blackberry to send messages to Veronica and Wallace. She already had a few texts from Veronica and Wallace. They were all checking in with each other.

_I'm fine. Talk to you later-V_

_Was in computer science class for tutoring, nothing to see here-Wallace_

Mac began a mass text message to Veronica, Wallace and her parents. She considered adding Cassidy to the message, but rethought it. Suddenly, the sound of Clemens voice boomed through the crowd.

"I know some of you have cars and want to go home. As soon as your parents come to sign you out, you may leave campus." Students began booing, but Clemens took it in stride. "I'm sorry those are the rules. If you don't like it, too bad."

Mac wandered through the parking lot and found her car. Sitting on the hood, she called her mom.

"Hi, Mom. No, I'm not sick. Listen, there was an incident on campus and I need you to come down and sign me out from school." Mac paused while her mother spoke. "No, I'm fine. Just come and sign me out, okay? I have a project I need to finish for school." Mac ended the phone call and sat down to wait. She looked around at the mass of students shuffling in the parking lot, reuniting with friends, calling their parents, and telling each other where they had been when "it" had happened. Mac became aware of how alone she felt with no one to reunite with.

The smell of Drakkar Noir pulled Mac from her thoughts. "So I'm supposed to be looking for you, but not, you know, be obvious about it."

Mac turned her head. Dick. "Why isn't Cassidy looking for me?"

"He's having some sort of panic attack in his car. Like, full blown. I had to steal some freshman's lunch bag for him to breathe into. He wanted to look for you, but he's having a major freak out. He was only a few feet away when Lucky went postal with the gun." Dick shrugged and pulled out his cell phone. "Found Mac. She is blowing me as I type this," Dick said as he typed out the message. He pressed send and looked at Mac. "What?"

"I'm blowing you? Are you for real?" Mac looked incredulously at Dick.

Dick took Mac's backpack and began digging through it. "It's not like it's even remotely going to happen." He pulled out her green smoothie and the banana she had saved for after school. "Do you have anything in here but fruit? This is disgusting."

"I'm a vegan," Mac said defensively.

Dick put the backpack back on the hood next to Mac. "Not even candy. This is just gross."

"Why am I expected to carry snacks for you?"

"You're not. I just can't believe anyone would be happy eating fruit and veggies all the time." Dick pulled out his phone. "Alright, so I'm gonna take a picture of you as proof of life for Beav." Mac flipped Dick the bird just as the flash went off. Dick said as he looked at the picture on his phone. "This is perfect. Listen, I gotta jet. I hear Madison had a total melt down. I'm going to try and 'comfort' her."

Mac couldn't help laughing at Dick. He was a total jackass, but she liked how dedicated he was becoming to Cassidy. A few moments later she received a text from Dick that he'd sent to both her and Cassidy (how the hell did he get her phone number?!). _For your spank bank _and the picture Dick had taken of her was attached. Mac shoved her phone back into her pocket, missing Cassidy's reply.

_Well, it is kinda hot._


	11. Chapter 11

He'd been sitting a few tables away when Lucky had stood up and started waving that gun around. The sad thing was that he knew exactly why Lucky was falling apart and there was nothing he could do about it. He'd taken refuge under the table and had started crawling, commando style, out of the lunch area. When students started stepping over him, trying to make their way to the parking lot, Cassidy had stood up and headed for his car. Suddenly, an overwhelming feeling of nausea overcame him and he threw up his lunch in some nearby bushes. Cassidy was still bent over and panting, when he felt someone clap their hand on his shoulder. He turned to see Dick holding out a can of 7Up towards him.

"I got this out of the machine for you," Dick nodded toward a nearby soda machine. "You gonna be okay?"

Cassidy started to nod and then threw up again. When he felt like there was nothing left to come up, he cracked open the can, took a sip, and spat it into the bushes. "I wish I could brush my teeth though." He swirled another mouthful of the fizzy drink in his mouth and spat it out. "My mouth tastes like an old sock."

Dick guided him to the hood of Cassidy's car and pushed him to sit down. "Yeah, that's the worst part of throwing up."

Cassidy looked up at Dick and remembered how often Dick had gotten hung over and thrown up. He held up the can to Dick. "Thanks. This'll help." He and Dick watched students milling around for awhile. "Was anyone hurt?"

Dick squinted at him. "Nah, but we'll probably get the rest of the day off. Once Logan checks in with Veronica, I was thinking we'd make it a three day weekend and head to Rosarito for some surfing. You up for that?"

Cassidy nodded and pulled out his cell phone. His heart surged when he saw that he had text messages. One was a picture Dick took of him throwing up and another was from his friend, Hart, asking him if he was okay. Nothing from Mac. Dick looked over at Cassidy.

"I saw Mac heading out of the computer lab a few minutes ago. You should find her and talk to her. Just to make sure she's okay. Chicks eat up stuff like that."

Cassidy shook his head. "I've got this bad breath," he gestured towards his mouth.

"She won't care. Look, I've got some Jolly Ranchers in my pocket, I think." Dick started to empty his pockets. "It'll freshen your breath." He waved a handful in Cassidy's face.

Cassidy angrily shoved Dick's hand away. "Leave me alone, Dick."

Dick sighed. "Is she still mad at you? I thought prom night got that sorted out."

Cassidy hopped off the hood of his car and unlocked the door. "It's not that easy. We've got some stuff to work out." He sat down inside his car and turned on the radio. He was hoping to see what the news had to say about it. Maybe Lucky would spill the beans about Woody and he wouldn't have to be involved at all.

"Are you kidding me? How complicated can a high school relationship be? You've already had sex. All your problems should be solved!" Dick groaned. "I'm so sick of this. I'm going to talk to her." He started walking away from Cassidy's car, thinking that at any moment Cassidy would stop him. Instead, he saw Cassidy intently listening to the local news radio station. He probably hadn't heard anything Dick had said. He guessed it was up to him to get those crazy kids back together. He saw Mac's car parked a few rows away. He figured it couldn't hurt to smooth the way for Cassidy.

A knock on Mac's bedroom window jolted her out of a deep sleep. Mac looked at her cellphone. It was two in the morning. She wasn't entirely sure that she had heard anything anyway. Maybe she'd woken up on her own. Mac had settled back into her bed when she heard three sharp raps on her window. Pulling aside her curtain, Mac saw what she thought was Cassidy standing outside her bedroom window.

"What are you doing here?"

Cassidy's muffled voice came through the glass. "I wanted to see you."

Mac pushed open her bedroom window and leaned out. "Here I am." Mac stifled a yawn. "What did you want?" Cassidy started to pull himself up to climb though Mac's window before she stopped him. "My parents would kill me and you if they found you in my bedroom in the middle of the night. You have to stay outside."

Cassidy nodded. "Got it." He kept forgetting that other people had parents who cared about them. "Do you think you could come outside?"

Mac sighed. "Does it really have to be right now, Beav? I'm tired."

Cassidy flinched at the use of Dick's nickname for him. "Sure. I'll talk to you at school." Cassidy turned at walk away.

"Wait!" Mac hissed out the window at him. "I'll be out in a minute."

In a few minutes she stepped outside of her house with a battered robe pulled over her pajamas. "So?"

Cassidy walked close and pulled her into a hug. Her familiar smell filled his lungs. "I'm really glad you're okay."

Mac hugged him back. "I feel the same way." She pulled away from his hug. "You could have done this at school. What's going on?"

Cassidy nodded toward what Mac recognized as Logan's yellow XTerra. "We're taking a three day weekend in Rosarito. I won't be at school tomorrow." Cassidy frowned. "Or should I say this morning? Anyway, I didn't get to see you after everything happened and I wanted to see you."

Mac gave him a shy smile. "Thanks. I was kind of annoyed that you sent Dick to check on me."

Cassidy looked confused. "Dick went to check on you?"

"Yeah, he said you asked him to. Dick said you were having a panic attack and you asked him to check on me," Mac gave Cassidy a piercing look. "You didn't do any of that?"

"It's not like I wouldn't have wanted him to . . ." Cassidy's voice trailed off.

"Were you even having a panic attack?" Mac demanded.

How could he explain that he was in a panic, but not about the school shooting? How would he be able to explain that he'd been so consumed with what Lucky would say about Woody that he hadn't thought about her until they were almost out of Neptune? Logan had stopped a gas station not far from Mac's house and while Dick was buying energy drinks in the convenience store, he'd begged Logan to take him by Mac's. He'd ended up paying for Logan's gas (this had been the bargain he'd struck with Logan), but it had been worth it.

Mac took Cassidy's blank stare to mean he was thinking of a lie to tell her. Mac groaned. "Look, just go on your surfing safari. I don't want to talk to you right now." Mac started back to her house.

"You just want to leave it like that? I won't be back until Monday." He called as loudly as he dared.

"Good. Maybe I won't be mad at you by then," she called back and opened the door to her house.

Cassidy glumly got back into the backseat of Logan's car. "That did not seem to go well," Logan commented.

Taking a can of beer from the cooler Dick had packed, Cassidy popped it open and took a long gulp. "Yeah, no kidding." It was going to be a long weekend.


	12. Chapter 12

He was supposed to be back by now. Actually, she knew he was back. Mac had figured Cassidy would skip school on Monday, but she'd expected to receive a text or some sign that he'd arrived home by Monday night. Monday had come and gone and she'd heard nothing from him. Then Tuesday had arrived and Mac had thought she'd see him in the halls. Except she hadn't. She thought Cassidy had taken an extended vacation, but Dick had pulled a fire alarm the last period of the day on Tuesday. Mac knew Cassidy better than to think he'd stay in Rosarito without Dick and Logan, so she was sure he was back in town. So where was he? Mac briefly considered borrowing the cell phone interceptor from her friend at Radio Shack again, but reconsidered when she saw Butters wandering the halls between homeroom and first period.

Mac knew Cassidy was avoiding her. Never one for confrontation, he was avoiding Mac until he figured she'd calmed down. He didn't seem to understand the more time that passed without trying to make things right with her, the angrier she became. She even spent Tuesday trying to frequent all his haunts at school, but he seemed to be avoiding them and her. He'd done this same thing the first couple of weeks they'd been broken up, but had gone back to his old habits shortly after they'd starting talking again.

By the time it was her free period (which Mac usually spent in the computer lab), Mac had built up a head full of steam. She'd decided to head for her car and spend some time by herself when she saw Cassidy's car parked a few spaces away from hers in the parking lot. Mac walked by the car to take a look inside. What she saw stopped her in her tracks and made her laugh at the same time. Someone had recently scratched "Amber is a bitch" into the side of Cassidy's car. Mac knew she should probably feel bad for him, but she was annoyed with him and he had the money for the repair to his paint job. Mac knew Cassidy would be upset, but at this moment in time she was having a hard time mustering up some sympathy for him. Laughing to herself, Mac decided to head to the computer lab instead of sitting in her car and feeling sorry for herself.

On her way to the computer lab, Mac was stopped by Veronica. "Mac!"

"Hey, Veronica. You'll never guess what I saw," Mac began.

Veronica interrupted her. "I have some information that may help you with your Cassidy problem."

"Oh yeah? What's that?" Mac asked casually. Mac figured Veronica already knew about what happened to Cassidy's car and she was wondering how Veronica would be able to turn this to her advantage.

"Someone carved 'Amber is a bitch' on the door of Cassidy's car. So I told him to tutor Weevil in math in exchange for Weevil fixing Cassidy's paint job."

Mac shook her head. "I'm missing the part where this helps me with my Cassidy problem."

"Do you remember telling me about the time when Cassidy tried to teach you to drive a stick shift?"

Mac nodded. "Yeah, it sucked. He's terrible at explaining things. We got into a huge fight about it."

Veronica gave Mac a pointed look. "So?" She waited for Mac to connect the dots.

"So? He and Weevil will butt heads when he tries to tutor Weevil. Weevil will crack his skull. Are you saying the solution to my Cassidy problem is his death?"

Veronica knocked her knuckles softly on the side of Mac's head. "Hello? You can step in when things go awry and offer to tutor Weevil. Just tell him he still has to fix Cassidy's car."

Mac's face took on an ah-ha look and then her happiness faded. "I don't even know when or where they're going to meet up."

"Weevil's final is tomorrow. There's no way Cassidy's going to Weevil's house or Weevil's going to the Casablancas. It's gotta happen at school. Today. Your job is to figure out where." Just then the lunch bell rang. "Listen, I have to go. I'm supposed to meet Gia Goodman."

"I'll tell you how things turn out. Thanks!" Mac yelled after Veronica's retreating figure. Seeing as how Cassidy had turned into the invisible man, it'd be easier to look for Weevil. She headed for the auto shop and followed Weevil from there to the lunch court. She took a seat at a nearby table and waited to see if Cassidy would show up. A few minutes later he did and after haggling with Weevil for a minute or two about how they would work out their arrangement, their tutoring session began. It was not going well.

"This is pointless," Weevil already sounded annoyed.

Cassidy ran his fingers though his hair. "No, okay, look. So you know quadratic equations, right?"

Weevil gave Cassidy a dark look. "Do I look like someone who knows quadratic equations, huh?"

"I'm just, I'm just trying to see what you already know." Cassidy was beginning to shrink back from Weevil's growing anger. Mac wondered if she should step in.

"Zero. You want your car fixed? Teach me."

Cassidy sighed. "Okay. Okay. Alright, look, so this equation here: what do you think we should do first?"

This seemed to anger Weevil further. "Am I a five year old girl? Lay it out for me, dawg! C'mon. Make me understand!"

"Okay, okay, okay!" Cassidy thought for a moment and seemed to get an idea. Mac worried he'd figured out a way to help Weevil and that she'd missed her opportunity. "So let's say that you and your buddy, you want to buy a twelve pack of a certain item. Say, like, um, like spark plugs for x dollars. And you want to find out how many of another item, like, um, I dunno, like oil, right? Like oil that you can get for the same amount, except oil is y times as much as-"

Weevil interrupted him. "If this is your idea of terms I'll understand, I'm going to kill you!" Beaver gave him a shocked look and Mac could tell he was fighting an inner battle about running scared and trying to get his car fixed. "Or myself. It's a toss up. Screw it, man. I'll just cheat."

"No, but . . ." Beaver paused. "What about my car?"

Now Mac knew she had them both. She waited to see how Weevil would respond.

"You know about power sanders, right? Well, let's say your door panel is a summer home, right? And you need to clear out the south lawn to make a tennis court. So what you got-"

Mac could see Cassidy starting to bristle from Weevil's words and decided to intervene. "F-O-I-L." Both guys looked at her. "That's all it is. First-Outside-Inside-Last. All of algebra? It's just a formula."

Weevil considered what she said. "Now can _you _teach me that?"

This is what she had been waiting for. Mac took her opportunity and ran with it. "You'll still fix his car?"

Weevil nodded. "That's the deal."

Mac got up from her table and took the pencil that Cassidy was holding from his hand. He looked defeated. She knew he was waiting for her to humiliate him in some way. His experiences with his family had never led him to believe someone could be genuinely nice to him without a motive. Mac felt a pang of sorrow for him. She often forgot that his jackass behavior was a front to hide vulnerabilities. That didn't mean she couldn't have a little bit of fun with him. "Okay. So let's say you and your buddy buy a twelve pack of spark plugs-" She looked at Weevil and saw him glaring at her. "I'm just kidding." Mac grabbed a nearby notepad. "Here's the quadratic equation," she began. Mac glanced up at Beaver. He smiled shyly at her. Mac smiled back. Maybe they could work something out after all.


	13. Chapter 13

Mac and Weevil were sitting in student desks, facing each other. Mac was checking the latest set of problems she had given Weevil to try.

"Okay, you put another X on that paper and we're gonna have a problem," Weevil said to her menacingly.

Mac knew that Cassidy was enjoying this. Despite his low self-esteem in nearly every other facet of his life, Cassidy prided himself on his intelligence. And he hated that Mac was trying to "show him up" by helping Weevil. Never mind that if she succeeded, his car would no longer have "Amber is a bitch" scratched into it. He was the only beneficiary if Mac was able to help Weevil, but all he cared about was having ego stroked if Mac failed at helping Weevil. In short, Weevil and Cassidy were both being assholes and it was putting Mac in a bad mood.

"I'd put smiley faces, but I don't know if that's gonna sell 'wrong,' Mac commented as she busied herself checking Weevil's work. She figured if her hands were busy, she'd lose her current inclination to strangle both of them.

From behind her, Cassidy said, "I told you you went too fast on balancing equations."

That was it. Mac could no longer ignore his annoyed sighs and grunts of dissatisfaction with her teaching. She whirled around to yell at him. "I didn't go too fast!"

Cassidy was satisfied now that he had her full attention. "You plowed right through! _I _didn't understand what you were talking about!"

Suddenly, _he_ was the most intelligent man on earth? Mac stopped thinking about how nice he looked in his blue shirt with the sleeves rolled up and focused on what a jackass he was being. "No surprise there," Mac said sarcastically as she continued looking over Weevil's work. What was with Weevil's handwriting? It was hard to make sense of his chicken scratch.

"What? Are you saying you're smarter than me?"

Mac smirked to herself as she listened to Cassidy's incredulous tone. "No, I wasn't. Here's what that would have sounded like: 'I'm smarter than you.' Hear the difference?"

"You don't really believe that?" Cassidy asked.

The guy was insufferable. "Then why'd I get it tattooed on my hip?"

"If that's what you need to feel better about yourself . . ." Cassidy said.

He was belittling her when she was helping him? Why was she trying to help someone who was actively trying to make her feel bad? What was wrong with her? "If I get you an A, will you shiv him?" She asked Weevil.

Weevil had clearly had enough. "Hey, I got an idea. How 'bout you two geniuses go work out your aggression in some coat room, and them come back here and teach me algebra, huh?"

Laughing, Mac turned around to look at Cassidy. He was laughing as well. She smiled at him invitingly and watched as Cassidy pulled up a student desk next to her. "Alright, how much more help does he need before we can get out of here?"

A few hours later, Cassidy followed her out to her car in the school's parking lot. Mac looked around for Cassidy's car. "Did you get a ride today?"

Cassidy shook his head. "No, I'm on the other side of the school. I just figured we should do what Weevil said. We don't want to get him mad."

Mac laughed. "I don't think you and Weevil have the same sort ideas about working out our aggressions, Cassidy." Nevertheless, Mac unlocked her passenger side door and nodded for Cassidy to get in. Cassidy pulled the car door open and climbed into Mac's back seat. "What are you doing?"

"Put the roof down and come join me back here." Cassidy waited as Mac started up her car and put the car's roof down. She climbed into the back seat to join him.

When she was settled in, Cassidy scooted closer to her and Mac put her head on his shoulder. After a few minutes, Mac spoke. "This is nice." And it was. She could feel Cassidy's warmth though his clothes and smell his familiar cologne. At this moment in time, she could think of nothing else she wanted or nowhere else she wanted to be. "What are we doing here?"

"Looking at the stars," Cassidy looked down at her and softly kissed her on the lips. "I want to be your boyfriend again. Can you forgive me?"

Mac smiled up at him. It was stupid, she knew. He had a lot of issues he wasn't ready to deal with and she couldn't help him with those issues, but she didn't care. At this moment, she just wanted to be his girlfriend again. "Yeah, I think I can."

"So I'm welcome at your graduation in a few days? I promise not to be embarrassing."

"Wouldn't you be there anyway? Isn't Dick graduating? Or were you planning to skip it?" Mac was confused.

Mac could feel the chuckle that rumbled through Cassidy's chest. "Dick doesn't have enough credits. He didn't pass science or something. He has to go to summer school."

Mac joined Cassidy in his laughter. "That's gotta suck."

"I know. Logan's having an after party that night. Wanna go?"

Mac nodded. "Sounds better than the senior lock-in I was planning to go to."

"I'll rent a room at the Neptune Grand and we'll make a whole night of it."

Mac could hear something in Cassidy's voice. Was it trepidation? "We could just go the party and have a good time," she said. "We don't need to get a room."

Cassidy squeezed his arm that was wrapped around Mac. "Nah, I think we should."

Mac smiled and nodded at Cassidy's suggestion. Somehow, she couldn't shake her feeling that something bad was about to happen. Maybe she was overthinking things. She should just live in the moment and enjoy right now.


	14. Chapter 14

Both she and Cassidy had nervously undressed on opposite sides of the bed in the Neptune Grand. Mac kept the lingerie she'd bought for the night on and slipped into the bed. Cassidy was slower to undress and she watched as he carefully folded his clothing on a nearby chair before getting into the bed. The covers were cold against Mac's skin and she edged closer to Cassidy to feel his warmth. Cassidy awkwardly put his arm around her and she looked into his eyes. There was nothing there. The warmth and spirit she was used to seeing were gone. He seemed like he was far away from her and the hotel room.

"You want to . . . uh . . . watch TV for a bit?" Cassidy asked her, nervously licking at his lips.

Mac nodded eagerly and watched as Cassidy turned on the TV and began changing channels, looking for something to watch. He stopped when he found a channel playing "Titanic." The feeling of unease and foreboding grew in Mac's stomach as they began to watch the love story unfold. They didn't need this pressure. Cassidy certainly didn't need this pressure. She wondered if he thought that was the sort of seduction she wanted. She felt Cassidy shift in the bed. She turned to look at him and found him looking back at her. She smiled at him and that's when Cassidy made his move. Suddenly, he pulled her close and pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was hard and frantic. Mac nearly pushed him away because it was unlike any other time she'd kissed him. Usually, his kisses were soft and tentative, as if he was unsure how to proceed or worried he'd do something wrong. Now Cassidy was pressing himself into her, pulling himself on top of her and it frightened Mac a bit. She knew what sex included and had thought herself ready for it, but when faced with the actual mechanics of it happening to her, Mac wasn't sure she was ready for it. Mac turned her head away from Cassidy's insistent lips and pushed him away from her as best she could.

"What?" Cassidy panted. "What's going on?"

Mac shook her head at him. Cassidy was propping himself above her. He looked concerned. "It just . . . feels weird." Cassidy's brow furrowed. "I mean, you're not weird. It's just happening so fast, you know?"

Cassidy rolled off of her. "Do you not want to . . .?" His voice trailed off.

Mac thought a moment. She looked Cassidy in his eyes. "This is my first time, you know? I want it to feel right. I know you said you know what you were doing-"

"I do," Cassidy's broke in.

Mac nodded. "I know. I know it's not your first time, but it is mine. You're not usually like this." Mac thought about what she knew of Cassidy's past and tried to think of a way to phrase what she wanted.

"What do you mean?"

Maybe she could show him. "I need you to be gentle with me. Like this," and she leaned over and kissed him softly on his neck. She moved slowly to his lips. "Okay?"

Cassidy nodded and began to gently kiss Mac on her lips and neck. Cassidy and Mac went on like that for what seemed like eternity. But whatever steam Cassidy had built up earlier had faded away and Mac felt that with each kiss she placed on his lips and his soft movements against her, he faded further and further away. Mac looked up at Cassidy and saw that his eyes were tightly closed and he looked pained, perhaps near tears. Mac stopped his movements against her.

"Hey, just hold on."

Cassidy stopped moving and looked miserably at her. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

Mac pulled herself to put her head on his chest and took a deep breath. "Let's not worry about it tonight. We've only been back together for a few days and things like this happen all the time."

Cassidy pulled himself away from her and stared sadly at the ceiling. "I just can't be normal."

Mac leaned on an elbow and looked at him. "Don't worry about it. I'm having a good time and we've got all night. We're cool here. I'm just gonna hop in the shower and then we can head back down to the party." She wanted to kiss him, but she got the feeling that he didn't want to be touched. Mac gently squeezed his forearm and headed to the shower.

Cassidy waited for a few minutes to pass and when he was sure Mac was in the shower, he got up from the bed and slowly dressed. He gathered up Mac's clothes and cellphone, stuffing them in his overnight bag, and pulled the covers from the bed. He headed for the bathroom and pushed open the door. The running water covered the noise of the door opening and Cassidy swiftly removed the towels from the bathroom. Cassidy left the hotel room and dropped the bedding and towels onto a nearby room service cart.

Pushing the elevator button, Cassidy thought about his plan of action. Really, he had nothing in mind beside going to the rooftop of the Neptune Grand and jumping off. He knew it was cruel to grab everything of Mac's and take off, but he didn't want her getting out of the hotel room before he could end it all. He wanted her safe in that room until it had ended. Cassidy was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of the elevator arriving at his floor. Cassidy stepped in and punched the button for the roof.


	15. Chapter 15

He looked so fragile in his hospital bed. Veronica had told her the basics of what had happened on the roof. She'd gone up there for fresh air to clear her thoughts and had encountered Cassidy stepping over the side of the Neptune Grand. He'd been about to jump off when Veronica had tried to stop him. On the way to the hospital, Veronica explained to Mac that she and Cassidy had struggled as she tried to pull him back from the edge of the roof and he struggled to pull himself both over. Veronica had pulled herself away from Cassidy's grip, planning to use her stun gun on him and pull him back from the brink. Cassidy had used that opportunity to push himself away from her and fall over the edge of the roof. Shocked, Veronica ran to the edge and saw him lay on the balcony of a lower floor. She had been relieved he'd hit the floor below instead of the street.

Mac now stood by his hospital bed wondering how Cassidy had gotten to this place in his life. She looked at the steady rise and fall of his chest and knew she should be glad he was still alive. She couldn't help being angry that he'd taken everything from her and left her alone and wet in their hotel room. She was also angry at herself for missing the signs of his depression. There were so many things about him she didn't understand and she didn't know if he'd ever let her in enough to understand.

Earlier, Mac had sat in the intensive care waiting room and watched the news, getting final confirmation of what she'd suspected about Cassidy. Woody Goodman was now on his way back to Neptune in police custody. He confessed to a series of crimes and the news had alluded to the fact that some of the children of Neptune's most prominent citizens were his victims. Things finally made sense to Mac.

"This is your fault," Dick said to her.

She hadn't even heard him walk up and stand next to her. Mac turned to Dick. "How is this my fault?"

"You jerked him around too much. He got depressed and he tried to kill himself." Dick's eyes were red and Mac could tell that he'd been crying.

Mac sighed. "Have you seen the news? Cassidy was a part of the whole Woody Goodman case. It was only a matter of time before something like this happened."

Dick shook his head. "No, Beaver would have told me if something happened to him. This is on you!"

Mac knew Dick was looking for someone to blame. It was easier than seeing his part in Cassidy's suicide attempt. Still, she let her anger get the best of her. "This is on you! You'd treated Cassidy like shit his whole life. It's a wonder he didn't try this earlier!"

A nurse came in to scold them. "There are people trying to recuperate. You are not allowed to yell. Go outside if you want to do that." She shooed them out of Cassidy's room and into the hallway. "Visitor's hours are over."

Dick wiped at the tears that were filling his eyes. "I'm not going. I'm his brother." He pointed a finger angrily at Mac. "You can kick this bitch out. She's his ex and he doesn't want to see her."

"I can't believe you're doing this," Mac angrily sputtered.

The nurse guided her down the hallway. "If you're not an immediate family member, I'm afraid you'll have to leave."

Mac turned around to yell a final warning to Dick. "This isn't over, Dick! You know Cassidy would want me to be there. When he wakes up, I'll be back."

But when Cassidy woke up, she wasn't back. Logan sent her a text the next morning to tell her that Cassidy was awake and hadn't sustained any serious head injuries. She'd asked if she could come down and see Cassidy, but Logan had said she'd shouldn't. Cassidy needed time, Logan had told her. _Give him a few more days. By then Dick will have settled down and he'll put you on his list of allowed visitors. _And so Mac had waited. Days passed and she heard nothing. To pass the time, she'd hacked Dick's bank account and put holds on all his credit and debit cards. It would take a while for the bank to unravel what she'd done and it made her feel better.

Then Logan had told Mac that Cassidy had been moved to a psychiatric hospital to treat his depression. She sent Cassidy a letter, hoping he'd write back and she'd be able to visit him. When she didn't hear anything, Mac had spent a month begging Dick to allow her to visit Cassidy. But when she was finally able to see him, he hadn't been happy to see her.

"Cassidy?" Mac's arms wrapped around him and he shifted in his wheelchair to shrug her away from him. Mac looked startled and pulled away from him. "Aren't you happy to see me? Did you get the letter I sent? I've missed you."

Cassidy took the brake off his wheelchair and wheeled himself over to a window and looked out disinterestedly.

"Aren't you going to talk to me? Are you mad at me?" There was desperation in her voice.

Cassidy turned his head to look at her. "Mad at you? Why aren't you mad at me? I left you alone in that room with no clothes. Nothing. How can you visit me and pretend like that never happened? You're pathetic."

Mac's eyes flashed angrily. "Pathetic? I'm not the one who tried to jump off the Neptune Grand and failed! I figured you were upset and weren't thinking straight, but maybe you were just being an asshole."

"I'm an asshole? Well, I guess I'd rather be an asshole than some pathetic girl who can't see that she's not wanted anymore. Didn't you get the hint when I grabbed all your stuff when you were in the shower? You couldn't even turn me on that night. Don't you understand that I wanted you to get away from me?" He grabbed her hand and pulled her close so he could whisper in her ear. "Don't come back. I don't want you here. "

Mac pulled her hand back and appraised him. She seemed to be trying to decide if he was being honest with her or was just lashing out. She nodded; more to herself it seemed than to him, and in a daze said, "You're right. It was a mistake to come here. I won't be back."

And she did leave and she never visited him there again


	16. Chapter 16

Author's Note

I'm continuing this story into "Good Luck Getting Laid . . ." I'll pick up the rest of the story from there.


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